Now that I’ve gotten your attention…

None of Dr. Seuss’ popular books are being removed, just six obscure ones you probably didn’t even know about before all this hullabaloo. His estate is choosing to pull them from stores and there’s nothing you can do about it. That’s called private enterprise.

Lola Bunny is a cartoon rabbit. Space Jam 2 is going to be terrible whether or not she’s well-endowed. They’re making a sequel nobody asked for because they know you’ll complain about it but ultimately probably still buy a ticket or rent it. The studio wants your money. For all you know, they did it just to get you talking.

Potato Head is a plastic potato with interchangeable body parts.

These are fictional characters and inanimate objects. They should not be making headlines. No one is imposing their will on anyone. These are choices being willingly made by people in positions to make them.

Please stop obsessing about things that don’t matter and feeding an outrage-industrial complex that thrives on your propensity for giving them attention by getting worked up over nothing.

You’re supposed to be adults.

So here’s something worth worrying about: anywhere between 1 in 5 and 1 in 7 American children is going hungry. No Kid Hungry is an acclaimed charity seeking to end this problem. With a tax-deductible donation, you can help put an end to child hunger.